The History Buff's Traditional Catholic Blog

it has been a very long time..

2008-08-14T15:14:00.003-04:00

Wow, I've let this thing sit for over a year now. I don't even know if anyone bothers to look at it anymore. Anyway, here is a short update:

I graduated and received my BA in History back in May and in October I am getting married. Currently, I have a job at the university library. That basically is it. I'll try to update this more. God bless you

I am a glutton and a sucker for punishment..

2007-01-09T22:33:00.000-05:00

AHHH, what was I thinking..taking three work intensive classes this semester? Argh...I have a ton of research and a nasty paper to write for Craft of the Historian, several intensive assignments for Ancient Rome, and tedious work in Latin II. :( This is going to be a killer semester but I hopefully should get through it..I am hoping for A's. Anyway...let the whippings commence :) LOL

Thoughts on Saddam's demise

2007-01-08T11:38:00.000-05:00

Well, the "Butcher of Bagdad" has finally gone to be judged by his Maker but today's news that the court in Iraq has dropped the charges concerning the treatment of the Kurds has made me wonder if his execution was just to begin with. I am for the death penalty in certain situations and in the case of Saddam, an execution was justified but....the way it was done was not just. It is wrong in any situation to taunt the accused as they are about to leave this earth. Now they have dropped some of the charges against him, after the fact that he is dead? This is odd. What is honestly going on over there? Its bad enough that we have put ourselves in this nasty situation in Iraq where we have lost so many lives..both American, our Allies, and innocent Iraqis. Now, the butcher who we overthrew is dead and they are clearing him? Why did we go there? When are we getting out? LOL..is this about oil as some crazy liberal, greenie people have been saying? Hmm, who knows. I'm throwing this up for discussion. I'd like to see what any of you think.

Happy New Year!

2007-01-08T11:29:00.000-05:00

LOL...I had thought that no one was looking at this blog anymore until I noticed that I have alot of unmoderated comments on Blogger. I'm so sorry. Anyway, this past year has been eventful for me. I went back to school and had got three A's this past semester in Latin I, Early Periods in British Literature, and the Cold War. This semester I am taking Latin II, Craft of the Historian, and Ancient Rome. Latin and Ancient Rome will be alot of fun..Craft of the Historian..not so much because it will probably feature more revisionist stupid stuff that you get in these sorts of classes. Oh well, I need it for my major. Happy Epiphany to everyone and yes..I will attempt to again post on this blog since I guess there are some people still out there who want to look at it ;)

God bless you :)

thoughts on Middle East, etc...

2006-07-21T18:09:00.000-04:00

I have been watching the news a bit these past couple of days. It looks like the Middle East is acting the way it usually has....in chaos, war, etc. Its like the 80's all over again. This doesn't look good either way it goes. I think that Israel should still be a state if only for there to be a non muslim state in the Middle East but I am very concerned about our fellow Catholic brothers and sisters over there. I believe there needs to be a cease fire immediately. Let us heed to plea of the Holy Father and pray that a solution can be made soon.

A return from a long hiatus....

2006-04-27T19:49:00.000-04:00

Well..it has been several months since I have last blogged. There has been alot going on that I would like to shortly comment on.

First: The rumors concerning the reconciliation of the SSPX and the possible liberation of the Tridentine Mass. Honestly, there isn't much I can say about it except that I'll believe it when I see it. There has been alot of rumors..some are plausible but we don't know what is going on really. There are several who think they do but until we hear something very official (coming from the Holy Father or one of the Congregations..of Worship, CDF, etc) there isn't much to talk about. It is my feeling that something is up..what that entails...well..only time will tell. We need to continue to pray for this as I do every day.

Second: on the personal front..I have been accepted as a novice oblate of the Militia Templi. We had our first preceptory meeting last week in Oklahoma. I had a wonderful time and made new friends :). I was also formally initiated into the Novitiate. I'm so happy to be a part of this order. I pray for their continued success.

Third: On Holy Saturday at the Easter Vigil, my baby brother was recieved into the loving arms of Holy Mother Church. I am so happy for him. I hope that he will stay faithful to Our Lord Jesus Christ and grow in the Faith.

These are all the developments that have happened so far. I will try to be a bit more regular in my posts when time permits. Feel free to leave messages in my combox. I enjoy good discussions :) God bless you all

On the cartoons depicting Mohammed...

2006-02-06T20:42:00.000-05:00

Hmmm...What to say about the cartoons and the needless violence that has ensued? I have seen the cartoons that were published in the Danish papers and others in Europe. To be very blunt and honest here...the pictures although disrespectful and for Muslims..offensive..aren't nearly as bad as the ones that have been made to bash Our Lord, Our Lady, and Holy Mother Church. There have been countless books, movies, cartoons, tv shows, etc that do nothing but bash the Catholic Church and the Faith she has held dear for 2,000 years. What has been the response to attacks on the Church? Has the Holy Father issued a holy war on those who make such stuff? Has the Church threatened to behead those who insult Our Lord? No, we don't do nothing. True, a few people write letters, organize boycotts, maybe a demonstration or two but nothing approaching the needless violence that these cartoons have ignited. This is absurd. The reaction that these protesters have demonstrated sadly has reinforced the stereotype that muslims are barbaric and backward and therefore cannot live in a modern society that "cherishes" freedom of expression, speech, etc. Of course, such freedoms must come with responsibility. Drawing these cartoons was not responsible.

In this country, political cartoons can be bitingly satirical and in the case of these cartoons, they are but some are also very tasteless. Both cases are wrong. On the one hand you have Godless Europe being shown for perhaps the first time (ok..not the first time but maybe some lights will come on in their heads..ok.. a very FEW heads)how dangerous militant Islam is. For years we have heard constant slogans such has "Death to America! Death to Israel!" Now, were are hearing other slogans aimed at some of the European nations. Will these demonstrations (riots) finally make these governments see the truth in their dire situation? No, probably not. They are blinded by their own arrogance (thinking that secularism is the best form of government and society, that religion..especially Christianity is worthless, that killing their children or just not having any is a good thing, etc)and will be killed by it. Europe has hated its own history for a long time. The roots of this started in the Protestant Revolt, grew during the "enlightenment" and became mature during the 20th century. Europe is perhaps in its death throes. I know that the Holy Father wants to do all he can to remind Europe of their Christian roots and perhaps, with God's Grace some hearts will soften to the Gospel..but there will only be a few pockets. Even now, there are a few, few pockets of Faith left in Europe. They will become like the Christians of the Middle East..marginalized and persecuted for centuries under what is most likely to be Muslim rule (the liberals will all be dead by then..no one to replace them because they have refused to reproduce themselves). We need to pray for our brothers and sisters in Europe, they are in for some very rough times. Meanwhile, our own country should also be looked after. The godless secularists who kow tow to Islamic fascism must not be allowed to completely take over our country in spite of their iron handed control of the most precious of resources we have--the children who are being fed drival, lies, and propaganda at the schools. We must continue to pray for our country and yes..for Europe. I hope some lights will turn on..in a good way (we don't want the other extreme of most European governments--totalitarian and inhumane).

An Update on the Militia Templi...

2006-01-22T20:28:00.000-05:00

For the past couple of months now I have been sinking my teeth into the Divine office everyday..praying Lauds, Vespers, and Compline and on occasion the other day hours. I have also been reading some of the books recommended to me by the Militia. Through this time I have been getting my materials together to send to them so that I will hope to be admitted as a novice. Well, that time has come. I have been informed that I have been accepted into the novitiate. I don't know how long this will take or where this will take me but I am excited to find out. Meanwhile, certain other issues have surfaced in regards to myself. I guess maybe I am under some sore of spiritual attack..I dunno. Anyway, please pray for me concerning this time.

There really isn't to much to comment on of late in regards to what is going on in the Church. It looks like the usual. I am looking forward to reading the Holy Father's first encyclical this comming week. Hopefully in the short future I will be able to have some time to do my series I have wanted to do here on the history of the papacy. I will have the first one up possibly sometime this week. Until then..God bless you all.

On finding lost Christianity..

2006-01-02T19:01:00.000-05:00

As some of you know, I work in a bookstore. I meet many different sorts of people who are curious about a wide number of subjects. Since that ridiculous davinci code came out a couple of years ago, interest in the Gnostic gospels have increased. I consistently get requests to find books on the Gnostic gospels (gospel of Thomas, gospel of Mary, etc). I have read a few of them before when I was studying the Faith. These books are clearly inferior to much in the Bible. Also, it is clear as to why they were never accepted as Scripture by the Church. These books are not apostolic, nor are they consistent with the Teachings of the Church.

In spite of the absurdity of these texts, they have become popular. I know why of course. These "gospels" are being used to undermine the Church and ultimately Our Lord Jesus Christ again. Why are they doing this? They hate the Truth. They hate the implications. The root of this problem I think is sex. Why?

Our Lord Jesus Christ, who has spoken through His Church, comprised of His Vicar on earth the pope, the successors to the Apostles the bishops, Sacred Scripture, the Church Fathers, the Saints, etc has stated that sex is only to be used within the bonds of marriage--Man and Woman married to each other to start a family. Of course, in this society, such a notion is absurd, archaic, unenlightened. We are better than this now of course. We know that there is no difference between the sexes. That women are entitled to kill their babies if they so choose. That it is fine to contracept. That it is fine to have sex with someone of the same sex, etc. All of this is fine. All of this is healthy, happy, no consequences.

Yet, we know that this isn't true. We know that there are consequences. What the modern world hates the most is being told they are doing wrong. There are eternal consequences to their actions. They don't want to be told this. They don't want to be reminded of it. So, they want to undermine the voice of the Church. They want to do everything to discredit Her. They want to discredit Her King, Our Lord Jesus Christ. They don't want to listen. Society wants to see the day that the Church dies for good. Yet, in spite of their best efforts, the Church still stands. Even the people within the Church who have harmed her by their own sinful actions have not succeeded in toppling Her. The world continues to rant, to rave, to stomp their feet in the hopes of toppling Her. So, they bring up biblical inconsistencies, bad popes, stupid legends such as "pope joan", the Inquisition, the Crusades, the so-called hostility to science (that isn't true at all), the "unenlightenment" of the middle ages, the so-called "oppression" of women, etc, etc.

Due to the popularity of the "davinci code" the shift has been now to presenting a massive "cover up". The gnostic gospels are supposedly the proof that modern society has to discredit Our Lord Jesus Christ and the Church He had founded. It is funny really. To think that the "nasty, evil, oppressive, misogynistic, Catholic church" has been covering up for the past 2,000 years the fact that Our Lord Jesus Christ wasn't God, that He has sex with Mary Magdalene, made her one of his top apostles, and for some stupid reason...founded the Merovingian line of French kings. Hahahaha. How stupid. How absurd. If the Church has been engaged in a massive cover up then She hasn't done a good job of it at all. She did not pursue killing all of the gnostic writers nor all of the heretics. In fact, if one looks at history at all, they must come away suprised that She hasn't covered up any of the Gnostic gospels. The books are still around. If there was a cover up, wouldn't these "gospels" be completely destroyed? Instead, for several centuries, many writings flourished that purported to be Sacred Scripture. It wasn't until the 4th century I believe, when a bunch of Catholic bishops got together to decide which books would be part of the Biblical canon and which ones would not be. Its a simple as that.

Much of these arguments against Holy Mother Church has for many years come from prots. For to long they have thought that as long as they "stand on the word" they would be immune from the secularist world too. However, due to the latest attacks on Our Lord in the form of the "Jesus seminar" and the davinci code, they have tried to defend historical Christianity. In spite of the best efforts on the part of evangelical prots, they can't win this argument that the proponents of the gnostic gospels and the davinci codes nuts advocate. Without the Church, they are powerless in the face of this. Yet, they refuse to submit to the truth, to acknowledge who it is that decided on the books of the Bible and who it is that is entrusted with spreading of the Faith today.

Modern society will continue to wage war against the Faith since it stands in their way. I believe it will only be a matter of time when these misguided prot heretics (those who want to seek truth) will find their way to Holy Mother Church. She needs her defenders. Those who seek to undermine the truth by spreading lies about Her and Her spouse and King will continue to do so. That is why we must always be attentive and informed. Read the history of Our Faith, the early Church fathers, and pray.

St. Thomas Becket, Pray for Us
Our Lady of Fatima, Pray for Us

The Feast of St. Thomas Becket

2005-12-29T10:13:00.000-05:00

Today is my patron saint's feast day and as I have been trying to do now for the past couple of years, I go to Mass on this day to worship God and honor St. Thomas. It sucks though that his feast day is within the Octave of Christmas. Due to this fact, his feast day gets overlooked. In the office today, there is a commemoration of him only at Lauds and at the Mass in the Tridentine Rite, the introit, collect, and other prayers are in his honor but not in the Normative rite. However, in spite of the fact that in the Normative rite there are no prayers to commemorate him (there is a short commemoration also in the Normative Rite's office too), at the Mass today, father did mention him so at least he is remembered some what.

St. Thomas had a very interesting life. He started out as the Chancellor to King Henry II. He was then appointed Archbishop of Canterbury by King Henry II (in those days, kings did that) so that he would (to Henry's mind) support all of the king's policies. He didn't. Some of the policies of Henry II were in conflict with the Church. St. Thomas Becket, although at first he would have probably accepted some of them, ended up not accepting any of them. Combine this with the strange decision on the part of Henry II to crown his son and the fiasco that that produced and the long argument that last several years, St. Thomas would not back down. Some believed that he was being stubborn and he had made many enemies. Yeah, that is true. St. Thomas did have a temper. He was stubborn and he did make several enemies. However, when his life was on the line, when it came down to the final moments in the Cathedral on December 29, 1170 as Vespers was being chanted, when the four knights among others came into the Cathedral demanding that he leave with them and calling him a traitor (he never committed treason in spite of the arguments that he had with the King), etc..he didn't leave. They demanded that he rescind the excommunications that he declared (he may have used to many excommunications..they tended to do that then..of course now...they don't use them enough) but he wouldn't. He decided that if he was to die, he would die defending Holy Mother Church's honor and die for the Glory of God. In the end, he did just that.

As a result, miracles happened after his death. Were all of them authentic? We honestly don't know. However, there were enough of them to believe that some of them were. After three years of his death, St. Thomas Becket was declared a saint and was to remain a popular one during the duration of the Middle Ages. I read somewhere that he is to be credited for keeping England in the faith for at least another 300 years. I tend to agree. England has had an attitude of rebellion for several centuries. You can see the seeds of in in the Middle Ages with the issues between several kings and the Pope (this is also true with some of the Germanic kings and the French ones). The tensions between the kings and the popes would explode under Henry VIII when another St. Thomas would come along and refuse to comply..thus sending him to his death too. For some reason, Henrys and Thomas's are friends for a bit, then become bitter enemies, and then the Thomas's get killed to often. Ok, so there are only two examples of that happening off the top of my head.

I truly believe that we need to revive devotion to St. Thomas Becket. Why? Well, he was a bishop who had a backbone (sadly to many of our bishops today have backbones of rubber..they are't strong at all) and we need bishops with backbones as well as priests. We have been very blessed to have popes with backbones..but we also need our shepherds to have them too. There are a few out there that do but to many don't. This is of course nothing new. If one were to read the history of the Church you would find many examples of bad popes, bishops, etc. That still leaves no excuse of course. Now, more than ever, we need defenders of the Faith. What better place to start than our own bishops? Let us ask for St. Thomas's intercession for our bishops and our Pope this day. I ask for his intercession frequently. I hope you do the same.

I screwed up Christmas :( !

2005-12-25T15:01:00.000-05:00

Well, I was hoping that this Christmas would go by smoothly but I opened my big mouth and well...everyone here is waiting for it to be over. It started last night when my sister wanted to watch part of the UCF game (she goes there). When it looked like they were going to lose, she started to get very upset and didn't want to do anything. We normally listen to the Christmas Story and watch "Its a Wonderful Life" but instead we were watching a terrible football game. Then it was finally time for Midnight Mass. Going there...everything was ok, etc but then I became very distracted at Mass. There were two fellas about three rows ahead of me. One of them had his arm around the other one and he was sitting very close to him. Throughout the Mass, he didn't stand up, he talking during the homily and he tried to doze off. Yeah, I know...I should have been keeping my eyes on what was happening at Mass but I became very distracted (I kept thinking he was being rude and showing disrespect from not standing). I hate when this happens (this is usually why I go to a Tridentine Mass and I usually sit at the very front...I don't get distracted as much..but no..we went to Midnight Mass at the local parish here and of course I get distracted). Well, to make matters worse..just after the Recessional, I got out of my pew..about to genuflect (it is something that Catholics are supposed to do when coming into the Church since Jesus is there in the Tabranacle) when I couldn't for the press of people. They would just get up and leave without showing any sign of reverence (most of these folks went to communion too). Well, I managed somehow although I was nearly run over.

Well, that is when it started I got into the car and I started to rant. Bad idea. My sister doesn't go to Church..much less a Catholic one (she thinks we are creepy..that we sound like drones when we are repeating phrases, etc)so when I was ranting about the genuflecting part, my sister didn't get it and I said some things I shouldn't have. Sadly, I came accross as this "holier than thou" person. I really am not. I know I can have a judgemental attitude and it is something I have to watch. As a result, my sister said that she hated Christmas that she didn't want to be woken up the next morning (we always have the Christmas music playing first..usually Nat King Cole..its our cue to get up)and I said..in a huff that I didn't want to either. My mom was upset, my dad..everybody. I screwed up Christmas because I opened my big mouth. My mom did put on the music this morning..but it was to low..so I didn't hear it at all.

I feel completely disgusted with myself. I got upset about something I shouldn't have..right after Midnight Mass which is supposed to be a Holy time. I should have been cheerful..but all I did this year is bring tears to everyone. And now...there is no chance that my sister would even become interested in the Faith. We are to creepy and rigid for her now :(. What a terrible defender of the Faith and a witness I am :(. I'm still crying. I don't know what I can do to make it better. Its hard..when I have an anti-Catholic mother who of course agrees with my sister's observations. What should I do? Anyway, I hope everyone else's Christmas's are better than mine. Maybe next year will be better.

Whew! then end of the semester finally....

2005-12-14T19:10:00.000-05:00

I know I haven't been keeping up with this blog like I was hoping to do but its been due to the fact I have been very busy. The Christmas hours are definitely upon us so I have been working late hours. Also, I just completely my last semester at the local community college here. After 10 years of off and on schooling, I'm finally getting my AA. Now, I can concentrate full time on my BA. I have decided to transfer to the local four year college here (UNF) so that I can major in History and perhaps get some philosophy classes too. Meanwhile, I'm still in the process for applying to the novitiate of the Militia Templi. Hopefullly, I should get all the stuff I need to do finished soon. Other than that, I will hopefully be able to get some other stuff done like writing more of the book that I have been trying to write in the past ten years.

There really isn't to much else to comment on the goings on in the Church and world. Most of the other blogs have done that and I guess I have been to busy to write any detailed commentary on it. Christmas is just around the corner although I hate to say it but I don't think I am looking forward to it all that much. This ridiculous commercialism makes the Advent/Christmas season a time to look forward to the least. I think its because I work in retail. It is a terrible time for us--nasty hours, nasty customers, etc. All we want to do is to get this over with. It is very hard to get into the "spirit." I only look forward to sleeping on Christmas day after going to Midnight Mass the night before. The time I look forward to the most is of course Holy Week and Easter. It is a much more peaceful time and a time that can't hide its Christian roots nearly as much as people are trying to do with Christmas. There is one other day that I am looking forward to this month--December 29th--the feast day of my patron Saint--St. Thomas Becket. I will be going to Mass that day in his honor. Anyway, enough rambling for now, although I will like to say something about the comments on this blog. Please, don't sign yourself annonymous. I have yet to find a way to delete comments but once I do, I will. Anyway, have a Blessed Christmas and Happy New Year.

Why don't the bishops get it?

2005-11-17T12:19:00.000-05:00

I know I haven't posted on the situation with the bishops at their conference that they have just had. It is sad to see really. Most of them think that the changes that were made after Vatican II were so good that we shouldn't change them or else the people would be upset (Trautman's response to the proposed changes in some of the prayers at the Mass that the current translations have been endearing to many of the people and therefore they shouldn't be changed to reflect the actual Latin text). This is of course absurd considering that he probably didn't have any problem with changing the Mass completely back in 1970. Lets face it, the translations are terrible and we need to have accurate ones but with the hemming and hawing that some of these bishops are doing I don't know if we will ever get good translations of the Mass. By doing so it will help in some ways to recover the sense of the sacred in the Liturgy. There are of course other things that can be done to foster greater reverence and sacredness in the Mass. Anyway, this always happens at the US Bishops conferences--nothing gets done.

Meanwhile, I am nearly done with this semester. Hopefully I can maintain the B that I have in statistics so that I can graduate. I will be getting my Associates degree if all goes well. Then I can concentrate entirely on my Bachelors degree. I'm still praying the Traditional Divine Office everyday (although I haven't been praying the Rosary like I should) and hopefully, if Father sends me the letter that I need, I can get the packet together to send to the Grand Master of the Militia Templi in Siena, Italy. However, its been over two weeks since I have written my parish pastor about my desire and the request that he write a short recommendation. I haven't recieved anything yet in the Mail. I'm sure that is where he would send it but I admit I didn't specify it in the letter. That is the only thing holding it up. Meanwhile, I am reading several books: The New Knighthood, Soul of the Apostolate, the Confessions of St. Augustine, and St. Bernard of Clairvoux. All of them are interesting and I read them according to my mood at the time. Please continue to pray for me and pray for my parish pastor that he will send me the letter. Also, pray for our Holy Father Pope Benedict XVI. It seems that he has a sore throat right now so please pray for him.

Happy Feast of All Saints!

2005-11-01T00:19:00.000-05:00

The fella who wrote me in the post below has responded. I think we will have a good discussion on the issues but I would like to also start a similar discussion on this blog. November 1st is a very, very special day to me since it was on this day that I was brought forth from my mothers womb. I was her first child. She had gone into labor on All Hallow's Eve but begged God that I wouldn't be born on the Vigil of All Saints (my mother, being a fundamentalist at that time believed it was a bad day). So, I ended up being born on 12:22 pm on the Feast of All Saints. Since becoming a Catholic, Halloween has grown on me. I even dress up now (I work at the mall and every year they have trick or treating so of course I would be dressed up to give out candy). At work I dressed up as the Wife of Bath, one of the Canterbury pilgrims. I enjoy it now since I didn't enjoy it as a child. In the years since I have become a Catholic, I have appreciated the importance of the Feast of All Saints. It is the day that we honor all of the Church triumphant and it is also the day that we reafirm our hope in the ressurection and enternal life. Also, November 2nd is a very important day--the day that we honor the Dead. We pray for all the souls in purgatory and remember those who have died. It truly is a beautiful time of year. I regret not having the same appreciation for Halloween, the Feast of All Saints, and the Feast of All Souls. I had always thought that Halloween was an evil holiday but since it is the day of remembering the dead, it truly isn't. It has grown on me. Face it--it is the only day of the year when an otherwise rational adult can dress in some odd or crazy costume and no one would think they are strange for wearing it. We can only get away with it once a year. Any other time will strike someone as odd.

Halloween is also the start of what I like to call "the Silly season." It also marks a very solemn time in the Liturgical Calendar. A winding down of the liturgical year. Then Advent comes and then Christmas. To our Catholic Faith and tradition it helps us to foster a devotion to the Holy Souls (remember that November is decicated to the Holy Souls in Purgatory) and to meditate on our own mortality. Then we wait in joyful anticipation of Christmas through Advent. However, on the Secular calendar, Halloween is the start of the "Silly Season." The season of the "irrational". In ancient Greece, they had divided up their calendar in similar ways. For most of the year it was given to the irrational, but for about three months it was given to Bacchaus (I know I spelled it wrong) "the irrational." I think we have done the same thing in our culture. First comes Halloween, the second biggest retail season/day of the year, then comes the gorge fest that we call Thanksgiving (yes there is actually a spiritual aspect to it but mostly its an excuse to gorge oneself, watch football, and sleep), and then we have the biggest retail season of the year, the one with all the parties, pagents, pictures, silly form letters, cards, endless specials, and of course the biggest of all--buying presents. Yep, I'm talking about Christmas. It has been synonmous with both sappy sentimentalism (inocuous Christmas songs that should never have been made sung by some of the worse singers in the world who also butcher good Christmas songs) and depression (sadly one to many suicides occur during Christmas that for some is the loneliest time of year). The season is also a time of to much stress and irritation. Tempers run high. Especially at the stores (I know exactly how bad it gets--I have been working in retail for over 6 years). The only time I look forward to during the Christmas buying season is Christmas Eve. Why is that? Well, its a short day--only 10 hours and I can leave around 6. But the most important reason is because I get to go to Midnight Mass. The Mass is one of the most beautiful Masses, ranking at least a good 3rd or forth behind the Massses and events of Holy Week and Corpus (I know I spelled it wrong but its late)Christi.

I wish I could enjoy the whole Christmas spirit, etc but it isn't easy to do when you have to work year after year with rude and irritable customers. I know, the employees don't always show charity as well but please show a bit of concern for us. We go through a lot through the whole year and it blows up 10 perhaps even more the size that it gets in the normal times of year. Customers can go crazy. We are not superman. We can't get the item to you automatically if we don't have it at the moment (and if an item has to be ordered, please place the order 2-3 weeks in advance, especially during Christmas instead of waiting till December 20th or 21st to get the item). Anyway, enough about holidays ( failed to mention New Year's--a day that is filled with carnivalesque partying to bring in the New Year--this rounds out the silly season). I hope to get some things accomplished tomorrow, being my birthday (28 years--wow where did all those years go to?). God bless you all and Happy All Saint's Day.

This is a Strange e-mail that I got....

2005-10-29T21:01:00.000-04:00

I don't know why I get the mail I sometimes do in my inbox but this one is odd for what it says and doesn't say. It starts out like this:

"Hi there,

I challenge you to refute the arguments containing by this book. I will
delete any argument that you can convincingly show me to be false.

It will hopefully be published next year."

It seems that this fella has written a "book" called "A Handbook for Catholic Traditionalists." It is basically a little book rehashing the same tired arguments about the Normative Mass, Vatican II, dialogue, ecumenism, etc, etc, etc. Why this guy believes I would try to refute what it says is odd and of course his disclaimer about deleting any argument he deems false is also strange. So, I decided to reply to him. The first time I tried (I used the reply button), the server sent the message back saying that the address was invalid. I tried it a second time and I guess it worked because I didn't recieve my reply back. He has still not got back to me. If he looks on this blog then I please ask that he do so but here is my response. Please feel free to comment on what I said below:

Thank you for your e-mail although I'm not sure why you have sent this to me. I don't have a problem with most of the stuff in it but I do have some concerns about the Traditionalist movement. I am a Traditionalist but I haven't been happy with the direction that its going to to much. I'm not exactly thrilled with what you have said about the Catechism of the Catholic Church. I haven't found any problems with it. I admit that it didn't mention the stuff that St. Pius X and other popes have said in regards to modernism, etc. However, look at what it does state. It condemns certain practices going on in the world: abortion, euthanasia, contraception, etc. The cross references in it quote from the Church Fathers, Scripture, and previous Councils. I think I know what the problem has been with Vatican II and what came after. According to a book I have read, the Council didn't have the "keys"--meaning--it didn't have any dogmatic statements like other councils. It has been up to Pope John Paul II and now Pope Benedict XVI to provide the keys for the council. Due to this lack of "keys" of course the modernists and others would highjack it to make it suit their ends. My big problem with how the Trad movement has been conducted is that we are stuck in the 1950's. We want to turn the clock completely back 180 degrees but that can't be done. So, we must respect the Council, the Popes since the Council, etc and work in service to the Church, always educating others about our rich heritage and tradition. I don't see very many trads doing any service to the Church. To often, they sit at their computer desks and armchairs and do nothing but complain, complain, complain. No wonder we aren't taken very seriously. Then, when you add to this the idiot sede vacantists--well---can't you see why many in the hiearchy, etc don't want us around? We aren't being very charitable. What is the point of the Mass? the sacraments? Our Traditions? Is it not to foster holiness? Is it not to Worship God? If this is so, where is the fruit of the movement? As long as we keep whining and complaining...nothing will get done. What good will the Most beautiful Mass this side of Heaven will do for us if we don't apply the Graces of the Mass to our own daily lives? We are living in the 21st century. The tactics used during the 1950's and before are simply not going to work now. We can't go 180 degrees backward. I honestly don't want us to. A very, very disturbing trend I have seen with some trads is the notion that to be trad you have to: reject Vatican II, the Normative Pauline Mass, All the Popes from Blessed Pope John XXIII to Pope Benedict XVI, be an anti-semite, and a conspiracy theory nut. The last part, especially the anti-semitism is very disturbing to me. We don't want to go there. We really don't. Yet, in the Remnant, the Catholic Family News, among some in the SSPX, etc, etc have done exactly that. Has everyone forgotten the blood shed in WWII??? Has everyone forgotten the kind of grief that our Dear Holy Father Pius XII experienced as well as the other future Popes experienced (especially Pope John Paul II and Benedict XVI?). Has anyone put forward the arguments concerning the impact of WWI, WWII, and the great depression on the Church? I haven't heard anything. To many "trad" apologists have been acting like its the very early 20th century with the rise of the modernists and what St. Pope Pius X did. What he did has not been rejected. But we can't live in a fortress bubble. We need to be on the offensive but we also must find allies. Have trads forgotten the holocost that is abortion? Don't you think it is prudent for the Church to try to find allies among even heretics that believe in the sanctity of human life so that we can be a strong voice in a world that is growing every dark with the culture of death? Remember the Cairo conference? The Bejing conference of the UN? Why do you think that it is very important to talk to..yes..to even "dialogue" with prots, the Orthodox churches (I would love to see that particular schism healed), and even with Muslims? It isn't so that they can automatically become Catholic although that is a hope. No, its to try to gather a coalition together to oppose these sick idiots who want abortion on demand, euthanasia, same sex marriage, etc. Our religious rights are being taken away day by day. If we don't team up with others of at least the same moral sense, where will our voice go? How can we be taken seriously? Now, with the threat of Islamic terrorism about our heads..it is even more imperative that we speak with moderate muslims. What did Pope Benedict XVI do at Cologne? He spoke not only to the Youth of the world (including trads)--but he also spoke with Jews and especially Muslims. What did he say to them? To the Muslims, he encouraged them to teach their children--especially in the Madrassas that terrorism is a terrible evil. He was very blunt about it. Something must be done about the spread of Islamic terrorism and the only true way that it can be eradicated is with education of the Young. To teach them that terrorism in the name of Allah is evil. They must foster a respect for all life. We must speak with others. Not so that we can water down our Faith. No. We must dialogue with others, presenting them with the Truth of the Faith through our example, our service, and our witness. Without being good examples--without fostering holiness--we won't get anywhere. The Trad movement will die. I don't want to see it die. I love the Tridentine Mass/sacraments and the older traditions. I think that they can breathe new life into what is already a very tired Catholic existence in most parishes here in the West.
We basically must get back to the bare--and I mean bare--basics. I think that the Catechism does just that. It isn't enough to have dogmatic statements (though those are very important). It isn't enough to go back to "tradition". That can be done in other ways. No, what matters is holiness, becoming a Saint, coperating with God's Grace because we need all the help we can get. We must defend Holy Mother Church. I think that the arguments as to what happened at the Council, what happened after the Council has honestly been beaten to death. If that is all we can offer is just a bunch of complaints and criticisms of the Council, the Normative Mass, etc then we really don't have anything to offer the Church in the 21st century. I think we need to rethink what we are doing. I don't want to see it die but if something isn't done now..then it will. Complaining will get us nowhere.

Please e-mail me back when you get this. I think this can be a lively discussion and I am more than willing to have a conversation about this (note--I don't want to argue since I do agree with most of the assessment in your handbook but lets talk about solutions). Please let me know.

sincerely,

Rachel :)

Our Lady of Guadalupe, Pray for Us
Our Lady of Fatima, Pray for Us
St Thomas Becket, Pray for Us

Please let me all know what you think of my response. It will help with future discussions. :)

update on yesterday..

2005-10-20T20:56:00.000-04:00

Well, today hasn't been good. I admit to being depressed today. I couldn't get the conversation out of my head so I called the church so that I can leave a message for Father to call me. He did later today. I have been so blessed to have good priests because Father helped me today as well as encouraged me to continue on the path that I should be on (going into the novitiate of the Militia Templi, etc). I just have to listen more carefully and make corrections for my brother so that he won't be taught heresy. Please pray for me. I'm going through some difficult times right now and I need all the help I can get.

Why must inquirers of the Catholic Faith have to go through RCIA?

2005-10-19T23:55:00.000-04:00

The younger of my two brothers has decided that he wants to come into Holy Mother Church so he is in the RCIA class at my parish. Mind you, before I say anything else, I must say this--this class is actually the best of the RCIAs in this diocese--which isn't saying very much. At least the Catechism is the text book but it is headed by the DRE who is a convert from the Methodist church. He is liberal in his views sometimes although he doesn't let them be known in the class, I hope. However, I was talking to him after class (I have been going to give support to my brother) about the Mass. He knows I am a traditionalist and that I love the tridentine rite. He for the most part didn't have a problem with me liking it but then-in answer to my question as to why many bishops do not allow the Mass and why they wouldn't want to use priests like FSSP and the Insitute of Christ the King--he stated that the reason why bishops wouldn't want to use them is because..and I quote.."the theology changed after Vatican II. That it was spirit led." I was very disturbed by what he said but then he backtracked and said that the Holy Spirit led the Church to change the emphasis of the Mass. I countered with some of the absurdities that I have seen in the Normative mass and he said that that may be going to far but he couldn't really backtracked on what he said. He stated that several priests and bishops believe the same thing. This is just the sort of thing that leads the SSPX and others to look like they were right all along. At least that is how it would look to many people. I was so disturbed by this statement that I looked at the Catechism again. It stated time and again that the Mass is a Holy Sacrifice, etc, etc. I'm still disturbed by it with knots in my stomach. I'm not happy that my brother has to go through this kind of class in order to be Catholic.

I have been taught that the Truths of the Catholic Church does not change and yet here is the very same person that I had as a teacher telling me this. I have thoughts of going even further trad but I don't know. I'm shaken though. Is what the sedevacantists, etc say are true? I have never thought so but...I don't know. I'm depressed now :(. All I want to do is give glory to God, defend Holy, Mother Church and promote the Tridentine Mass/sacraments. I believe all the truths of Holy Mother Church and I believe that they dogmas of the Church..the theology of the Church has not changed...but to say that they had..and then say "well..there is a different emphasis now" is very, very depressing to me. I feel sick now :(.

Who would have thought it?

2005-10-09T21:54:00.000-04:00

LOL, it makes sense I guess since my name is Rachel (it means little lamb)

You Are A: Lamb!

Peaceful and gentle, lambs have been used in religious imagery for millennia. Lambs are baby sheep, an animal tended by shephards since the dawn of history. As a lamb, you tend to stay together in a flock and graze on grassy land. Lambs don't mind being led and tend not to go off on their own.

You were almost a: Kitten or a Bear Cub
You are least like a: Squirrel or a Duck What Cute Animal Are You?

Our Lady, Queen of the Holy Rosary

2005-10-07T12:30:00.000-04:00

Today is a special feast celebrating the Rosary but more importantly the victory at Lepanto. The Rosary has been special to me in my life. Before I was a Catholic, at the time when I was studying the Faith and going through RCIA, it was the Rosary and going to Mass that helped to sustain me while anticipating reception into the arms of Holy Mother Church. I witnessed the power of the Rosary when Mother Angelica was healed in 1998. That was when I decided to take it up because of the miracle that occured with Mother during the praying of the Rosary. It is such a beautiful devotion and although I admit I haven't prayed it nearly as much as I should (that is changing though since I am praying the Divine Office I might as well also pray the Rosary too). I find it odd that to some protestants, they think we adore Mary 10 to 1 since in the Rosary we pray 10 Hail Marys a decade to one Our Father and one Glory Be. It isn't the quanity of the prayers that is the key but the meditation of the Mysteries: all which are related to the Life of Our Lord Jesus Christ. I know that Our Lady has helped me alot in these past couple of years and continue to do so. So, everyone--get out your Rosaries today, pray it for these intentions:

For Holy Mother Church
Bishops and Priests
the Holy Father Pope Benedict XVI
for Holy Vocations
for the Eucharistic Synod taking place in Rome
for the full return of the Tridentine Mass/Sacraments
for heretics, schismatics, and pagans that they will convert to the One True Faith
and any other intentions.

I usually have a long list of intentions to pray for. Of course, the Holy Father's intentions for October can also be added as well.

Meanwhile, I am not praying the Divine Office so blindly now since I am on the Militia Templii e-mail list. On it, one of the fellas gives the instructions for the Divine Office each day so I shouldn't get lost from now on. Now--all I need to do is properly pronounce the Latin and slowly buy the books I need for this novitiate. Also, I need to talk to Father at my parish. I need a small note stating that I am a practicing Catholic in good standing with the Church. I don't think that will be so difficult. Then I can put the rest of it together and send it off to Italy.

My brother has started RCIA. So far, so good. Although it would do him well to read the lessons several days in advance instead of waiting till the last minute. My father and I have been going to the classes to support him. Pray for him and me as wel embark on similar but very different journeys. Pleases feel free to make and comments and suggestions in the combox. God bless you

Navigating blindly through the Divine Office...

2005-09-30T13:45:00.000-04:00

I recieved the Breviarium Romanum yesterday in preparation for my novitiate. In the Militia Templii, all members are required to pray at least Lauds and Vespers in Latin according to the Breviary in use in 1960. The fun part is...trying to navigate through it. Hopefully soon, one of the other novices will give me the information I need to use it (he sends out a mailing list on how to use the Divine Office). I am actually very excited about doing this. Also with the Divine Office, I was given the necessary materials I will need to apply. There is also a reading list. All the materials are in keeping with the Faith--nothing schismatic. There is a book called Iota Unum that deals with all the kookiness in the 20th century. Has anyone read it and is it any good? The rest of the materials are no brainers (the Catechism, Bible, St. Augustine's confessions, etc). They definitely are in good standing with the Church though since they require that all get familiar with the documents of VII, the Catechism of the Catholic Church, and several encyclicals from Blessed Pope John XXIII, Pope Paul VI, and Pope John Paul II. I find that on to many "traditional" websites, they don't recommend any writings from any of these popes that I have mentioned. Not only that, they don't recommend any current books. The reading list however, for the Militia Templii has recommended several books that are more current but definitely faithful to Holy Mother Church.

They require that I get a copy of my baptismal certificate, confirmation certificate (both that I have), a letter from my parish priest stating that I am a good Catholic in good standing, and a letter stating why I want to be admited into the order, etc. Hopefully, none of these will be to difficult to obtain. I don't think that my parish priests will have a problem with the order although I don't think they would be familiar with it. So, here is hoping that I can figure out this Divine Office and fulfill the duties necessary to enter the order and do what I can for Holy Mother Church. :) Any comments are definitely welcome..please feel free to use my combox as long as the conversation is civil.

Back from a short hiatus...

2005-09-28T17:17:00.000-04:00

Ok, I admit I haven't been as faithful in keeping up with this blog like I pledged I would do. Anyway, many things have happened in a month. First, terrible stuff has happened in the Gulf Coast. Please continue to pray for all the victims of Katrina and Rita. Second, school hasn't been the greatest but I'm hanging in there as much as I can. I want to comment on a few of the things I have seen going on at the Vatican.

First: although I am not completely happy with the document, I understand why the Holy Father has had to take such a drastic step in stemming the flow of seminarians who are not willing to live by the teachings of the Church. Barring Homosexuals will at least...we hope..stop the seething subculture that has creeped up in to many seminaries (check out goodbye, good men to see what I mean). It looks like a purging is taking place in the Church. This is long overdue. I pray for the Holy Father every day. He needs all our prayers since he is being pushed from all sides. This document has of course incurred the temper tantrums of the heretics. They have been ranting and raving (from annoymous "gay" priests, to folks like Andrew Sullivan, etc). Let us pray that due to this purging (pruning I should say) that Holy Vocations will rise. Meanwhile, I got my Chaplet of St. Thomas Becket and I pray now everyday for Holy Mother Church, for Holy Vocations, for the Holy Father, for the restoration of Europe to the One True Faith, etc. This is what I hope at least.

Second: We must pray ever more fervently for the Eucharistic Synod that is taking place next month. If what Cardinal Estevez is true and if some other people who watch the Vatican are right..then I rejoice in the news that a universal indult will be given for the Tridentine Mass. I will continue to promote the Faith and the Tridentine Mass--for its promotion and restoration to much of Catholic life. We have lost so much of our heritage and tradition as Catholics. It is time to regain some of it. I have asked for the aid of Our Lady, St. Thomas Becket, and all the saints for this intention. Keep Praying!

Third: After reading the interview at Catholic Monarchist concerning the Militia Templii, I have decided to start the novitiate to join the order as a "Dame of Devotion". I want to do this. It will give me some structure to my Spiritual life and its goals is much like mine..to Defend Holy Mother Church and Proclaim the Faith. Hopefully I will get out of debt soon...so my dream of studying in Rome can become a reality.

These are just a couple of things that are on my mind right now. I hope to be more prompt in blogging. Meanwhile I have been reading several books on St. Thomas Becket. He was a remarkable fella--obsinate, stubborn, sometimes inflexible and yet..he stood his ground even unto Death and as a result..is honored among the Martyrs. His life shows that one can have a topsy turvy life (being a worldy chancellor one day, and archbishop the next trying to do what is right and sometimes being to stubborn to make peace, making bad mistakes, etc that eventually gets him killed) and yet become a saint. What a fascinating life :). Anyway, this stubborn fella who wanted to defend the Church's liberties has insured by his intercession that this lowly and insignificant girl who was a baptist would become a Catholic and do whatever she could in a small way to defend Our Lord, the One True Faith, and Holy Mother Church. I don't know what God has in store for me but I keep trusting in Him, certain that He will lead me where I need to be.

Kyrie Elesion! On New Orleans

2005-08-28T23:46:00.000-04:00

Pray for the people of New Orleans and all who are in the path of Hurricane Katrina. There will be many lives lost and many people homeless. They need our prayers. I think I will pray the Litany of the Saints and Ask Our Lord for mercy on them all..on us all.

World Youth Day ends and school begins...

2005-08-25T15:58:00.000-04:00

Well, watching the World Youth Day events was a lot of fun and the Holy Father has given so many addresses that one will have to read each one carefully for the many gems that they carry. Now, on to the next and more significant event that is happening in a few days. The Holy Father is going to meet with I believe the head of the SSPX: Bishop Fellay (I think that is how his name is spelled). I am certain not expecting any bombshells at this meeting but it is a fine gesture to reach out to them four months into Benedict XVI's papacy. I hope there will be positive results but I certainly have no expectations. The SSPX have sadly proven themselves to be whiners and unwilling to compromise. I love the Tridentine Mass but I refuse to go to one outside of the Church. I do remain a loyal daughter of the Church. I don't deny the validity of Vatican II nor the New or Normative Mass. Hopefully though there will be a renewed opportunity to heal the schism and welcome the SSPX..at least those who haven't lost the faith back into the Fold of Holy Mother Church.

Well, I have started school again. I am only taking two classes: Art History and Statistics. The reason why these? Well, I'm still trying to get my AA degree but I have had trouble passing the Math classes. This is my last chance to past another Math class and get the degree. In order for me to have got the loan though I had to take a minimum of two classes so I decided to take the only other thing that they have there...Art history (that is the only thing there that I haven't taken). Hopefully, if all goes according to plan...I will get the AA, transfer to UNF and finish my BA and then............well....I have a funny dream about going to Rome for graduate school..possibly study philosophy and theology. But that is a dream that I am praying about. First though...I need to get out of debt then I can think about saving money. Its going to be a long road yet. Please keep me in your prayers.

World Youth Day has begun!!!

2005-08-17T09:33:00.000-04:00

Its been a busy couple of weeks which is why I haven't blogged in a while. I'm still trying to get the chaplet of St. Thomas Becket. As soon as I have the money, I'll get it. I believe it is important to revive the devotion to St. Thomas Becket. It coincides with Pope Benedict XVI's goal to reevangelize Europe.

Due to the lack of money, debts, and school starting soon, I didn't get to go to World Youth Day. However, I am definately there in spirit. My heart is still in Rome since April so it didn't travel to far to Cologne :). I saw the opening Mass yesterday with Archbishop Joachim Cardinal Meisner. EWTN was having technical difficulties and didn't get it straightened out until 20 minutes into the Mass. However, I was able to hear the Cardinal's homily. I think he is one of my favorite Cardinal's now :). He was so energetic and happy and full of joy. I wasn't to thrilled that the crowd started to go wild when the Deacon was trying to chant the "ite missa est" and the Cardinal tried to calm them down so that the Mass can officially be over. He calmed them with much patience. If they were going this wild with the Archbishop, I can't imagine how wild they will get when the Holy Father gets there tomorrow. The only other thing I didn't like was the "gifts" that were given during the offertory but this is something that is typically done at World Youth Days. I'm going to catch as many events as I can this week :).

I did watch the movie, "The Man Who Became Pope". It was well done although I think they started to rush his life story after WWII. It was very moving and I started to cry when the nazi soldier refused to carry out atrocities and was executed for it. Not only was he executed but so was the priest who heard his last confession. I recommend the movie to anyone. Another one I will recommend is ,"March of the Penguins". I have always been a penguin lover (I collect penguin figurines, stuff animals, etc) so I especially loved this one. It is beautifully done. The story is simply the life cycle of a penguin. They are tough and hardy birds :). They have to be since they live in one of the coldest places on earth.

Anyway, pray for World Youth Day. Pray that this event will light a fire in the heart of Europe. It needs it badly. Europe has lost their soul :(. But hopefully, with this event and the encouragement of the Holy Father, some fires can be started.

St. Thomas Becket, Pray for Us
Our Lady of Fatima, Pray for Us
The Holy Three Kings, Pray for Us
Pope John Paul II, Pray for Us

A new Chaplet that I am trying to make...

2005-08-05T23:54:00.000-04:00

Well, as all of you know from my last post, i have been thinking about my patron saint, St. Thomas Becket. I found a site http://gigibeads.net/prayerbeads/saints/thomasbecket.html, that actually has a St. Thomas Becket chaplet on it. It is an Anglican site though and the chaplet, although there is nothing wrong with it (it has scripture verses, etc) it is taken from the Anglican missal. Because of that I have decided to modify the chaplet. Hopefully, when I actually get some decent money, I'll buy one of the chaplets (I have decided on the one at the very bottom) and add a St. Thomas Becket medal and crucifix to it. Meanwhile, I have compiled a Catholic chaplet that can be used for it. I'm not sure if I want to have the seven Hail Mary's though. Here is my modifications and the original Anglican one:

Catholic Chaplet of St. Thomas Becket

A chaplet that can be prayed for holy vocations, the restoration of Europe to the Faith and the reunification of the Church in the West.

On Crucifix: make sign of the cross and then pray:

O God, for the sake of Whose Church the glorious Bishop Thomas fell by the sword of ungodly men: grant, we beseech Thee, that all who implore his aid, may obtain the good fruit of his petition. Through our Lord Jesus Christ, Who livest and reignest with Thee in the unity of the Holy Ghost, forever and ever. Amen

First bead: Our Father

Second bead: Glory Be

On the seven beads: Hail Mary

Closing Prayer on Medal: Oh Good Jesus, for the sake of Thomas forgive us our trespasses, be present in our house, our gate and at his shrine and keep us safe from fell death. Restore to us our customary piety and keep us from straying in mind and body. Glory be to the Father and to the Son and to the Holy Ghost, as it was in the beginning, is now and ever shall be, world without end. Amen..

The two prayers can be substituted with the ones below:

Anglican Chaplet of St. Thomas Becket

Cross: Almighty and everlasting God, who kindled the flame of your love in the heart of your holy martyr Thomas Becket: Grant to us, your humble servants, a like faith and power of love, that we who rejoice in his triumph may profit by his example; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen. -- BCP

Invitatory Bead: O God, our strength and our salvation, you called your servant Thomas Becket to be a shepherd of your people and a defender of your Church: Keep your household from all evil and raise up among us faithful bishops and priests who are wise in the ways of the Gospel; through Jesus Christ the shepherd of our souls, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen. -- BCP

Cruciform Bead: "...how great and how many are the wonders of the Lord God..." -- 2 Esdras 2:48

Week Beads: Psalm 126 1st: When the LORD restored the fortunes of Zion, then were we like those who dream.

2nd: Then was our mouth filled with laughter, and our tongue with shouts of joy.

3rd: Then they said among the nations, "The LORD has done great things for them."

4th: The LORD has done great things for us, and we are glad indeed.

5th: Restore our fortunes, O LORD, like the watercourses of the Negev.

6th: Those who sowed with tears will reap with songs of joy.

7th: Those who go out weeping, carrying the seed, will come again with joy, shouldering their sheaves.

Exit Cross: Jesus told the twelve disciples, "See, I am sending you out like sheep into the midst of wolves; so be wise as serpents and innocent as doves. Beware of them, for they will hand you over to councils and flog you in their synagogues; and you will be dragged before governors and kings because of me, as a testimony to them and the Gentiles. When they hand you over, do not worry about how you are to speak or what you are to say; for what you are to say will be given to you at that time; for it is not you who speak, but the Spirit of your Father speaking through you. Brother will betray brother to death, and a father his child, and children will rise against parents and have them put to death; and you will be hated by all because of my name. But the one who endures to the end will be saved. " -- Matthew 10:16-22

I had thought about a prayer similar to the St. Jude prayer in the St. Jude Chaplet to be used for the seven beads. The chaplet of St. Jude that I am thinking about has fourty beads. Instead of the Hail Mary, this is what is said on each bead: "St. Jude, Apostle martyr and relative of Our Lord Jesus Christ, of Mary and of Joseph, intercede for us."

I might be able to modify this one to apply to the chaplet of St. Thomas Becket. Please give me feedback on what you think of it. Any suggestions will be appreciated. Meanwhile, I need to make several special requests. There is a family at my parish who I am friends with. Recently, one of their sons has been diagnosed with Hodgkin's disease. He was one of our altar boys at the Tridentine Mass here. he is only 11 years old. His name is Andrew Garcia. Please pray for him and the entire Garcia family as they go through this very tough time.

As for me, I will be starting school again very soon. I hope and hope I'll be able to pass this class this time so that I can get my AA and transfer to the four year college where I can finish up my BA degree. It has been a hard road for me and will continue to be so. Please keep me in your prayers as well as Andrew Garcia.

What a July this has been!!

2005-07-28T22:44:00.000-04:00

I'm sorry for the delay in my posts but I have been kinda busy these past couple of weeks. There are several things to post about and most of them involving Merry Ole' England.

First when will these perverted thugs who claim they are following God stop killing innocent people? I was very upset about the London bombings. I was there twice in England in the early 1990's and remember using the tube often. England holds a special place in my heart which I will discuss later in this post. I am pleased with the Holy Father's response to these nasty attacks. Hopefully, the Holy Father's prayer will be united to our own and God will help stir these terrorist's hearts so that they will undergo at least some sort of conversion if only to show some shred of compassion to stop blowing themsevles up along with others with them.

Second: the days leading up to and the days after July 16th have been hectic. I have already devoured Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince twice :). I believe this is her best yet. It definitely has grown out of that "oh gee, Harry is having adventures and playing quidditch" routine that some reporters still think the books are about. This book definitely defines the lines between good and evil although we are still stuck wondering about one character in particular at the end. I refuse to give anything away (I hate spoilers) so I'm not saying a word. Lets just say though, I choked up at the end of it.

Third: for some reason I had been thinking about my patron saint a lot in the past couple of days. I know that for years I had hoped to find some sort of religious article, like a medal for instance of him so that I can wear it. I had all just about given up until yesterday. YESS!!!! I finally found a medal of my patron saint: St. Thomas Becket. I was so, so happy. When I get my paycheck, that will be the first thing after my bills that I will buy. I also found some books that I want to buy at ABEbooks. com. They are an equivalent to an online used bookstore and I found some interesting books on St. Thomas Becket. Of course, you are all probably wondering why him of all people? Why not St. Therese, St. Rita, St. Maria, St. Bernardette, St. Ann, St. Monica, St. Faustina, etc, etc, etc? Well, I was confirmed with actually four saint's names: St. Catherine Thomas Thomas Francis or St. Catherine Thomas Francis. Why these four?

The first Catholic parish that I went to when I was curious about the Faith was St. Catherine of Siena Catholic Church, a church that is close to where I live. I consider it to be my second parish since I go to Immaculate Conception every week for Sunday Mass and am involved there more. However, St. Catherine's does have perpetual Adoration which I go to every Friday. So, I felt it was only proper that at least one of the Saint's names that I would choose as my confirmation name would be a woman. Of the two Thomas's, I felt that St. Thomas Aquinas would be a good one to be named after since he was such a brilliant intellectual and I love to learn (that is how I came into the Faith to begin with). Francis is of course named for St. Francis of Assisi. I liked his simplicity and humily. He was also a mystic and I felt that I was drawn to that if only in a tiny amount. However, the saint that I felt the closest to and the one that I regard with the most affection; aside from Our Lady of course (and none of this compares with the love I have for Our Blessed Lord) is St. Thomas Becket. For the reasons surrounding this I must take you on a small journey back to the first week of March, 1992 still eveloped in winter's biting chill.

I was only 14 years old and still in the 8th grade when I had embarked from the plane in the wonderland that is Germany. At the little school that I went to, a trip was made of the band and choir students (I was in band at the time--clarinet player) to England for a so-called "music study trip." I wanted to go badly (having scenes from the Chronicles of Narnia and Mary Poppins stuck in my head of London) and my parents agreed. So, off I went with a small group of kids who could go. We went by ferry from Ostende, Belgium to Dover, England and onward to London with a short stop in Canterbury along the way. This short stop would change my life forever and would eventually lead me in the loving arms of Holy Mother Church.

Since we were a small enough group we were divided into two. The first group would go to the Cathedral while the other group would go to the "Canterbury Tales", an interactive show kinda like what you would see at Disney land. It had life size figures of Chaucer and the pilgrims. You walked from the Tabard Inn, to other parts of the tales and end at the Shrine of St. Thomas Becket. Along the way, there was narration, light effects, sound effects, and yes...smell effects (do you want to know what a horse stable at dawn smells like or a fish market?). LOL, it was very enjoyable to experience (I was with the second group..the ones who went to the "Canterbury Tales" first). It was this experience that inspired me to read the Canterbury Tales later on as well as other history related to Chaucer, the Middle Ages, Shakespeare, etc..and on down to the mythology I love alot and ultimately to the study of Holy Mother Church.

After the "Canterbury Tales", it was my groups turn to go to the Cathedral. I had never been inside a Cathedral before so this was a real treat. It was very beautiful in a wounded sort of way. I saw first hand what had happened to it (niches where statues once stood, white washed ceilings of the crypt once covered with beautiful illuminated paintings, and a general feeling of emptiness, as if the very life had been taken away).

However, the most significant part of the tour was the tale of St. Thomas Becket. We went into the very place where he was murdered (there is a memorial of four swords there, one being horizontal), saw the stained glass windows of the miracles that occured after his death, and the place where the shrine once stood, now only memorialized by one lone candle..a pitiful tribute to a wonderful saint and a shrine where many came to pray. Yes, that shrine was destroyed too..by Henry VIII's goons (actually Cramner's..I think I spelled his name right). What impressed me the most about the story was the miracles. I had never heard of the bones, teeth, hair and blood of a slain man to actually be used to enact miracles before. In my mind I thought there is no way that these things could have happened..this is just the sort of fanciful stories that medieval people told but on the other hand, I thought that surely God can use anything He wishes to heal and who am I to say that these miracles didn't happen the way they were reported? Did I live back in those days?

So, in my mind..I was made up..I believed that God can use the blood, skin, and bones of a saint for His own purposes and that the people back in the Medieval period were smarter than our history books would indicate. This experience at Canterbury and England as a whole actually was the first step in my journey to the Catholic Faith. So, when I learned about the importance of the Communion of Saints and that pilgrimages still exist like the sort that were taken to Canterbury..I was thrilled. I felt..and I know this might sound somewhat funny...but I do believe that St. Thomas Becket was praying for me that day...in the Cathedral where he was shepherd. His example is an inspiration for me to serve Our Blessed Lord and defend Holy Mother Church by staying loyal to her and the Holy Father. I also believe that he is a beautiful example of how a bishop really should be and I only hope that our bishops now would follow the example of the Blissful Martyr. I will close with this prayer:

Prayer for St Thomas' Day from the Roman Missal
Oremus. Deus, pro cuius Ecclesia gloriosus, Pontifex Thomas gladiis impiorum occubuit: praesta quaesumus; ut omnes qui implorant auxillium, petitionis suae salutarem consequamur effectum. Per Dominum nostrum Jesum Christum, qui Tecum vivit et regnat in unitate Spiritus Sancti Deus, per omnia saecula saeculorum. Amen.

Let us pray. O God, for the sake of Whose Church the glorious Bishop Thomas fell by the sword of ungodly men: grant, we beseech Thee, that all who implore his aid, may obtain the good fruit of his petition. Through our Lord Jesus Christ, Who livest and reignest with Thee in the unity of the Holy Ghost, forever and ever. Amen.
Responsory XII From the Office of Matins for St Thomas' Day (Sarum Rite)

Jesu Bone, per Thome merita nostra nobis dimitte debita, domum, portam, sepulchrum vista, et a trina nos a morte suscita. Actu, mente vel usu perdita pietate restaura solita. Gloria Patri et Filio et Spiritu Sancto, sicut erat in principio et nunc et semper, et in saecula saeculorum. Amen.

Oh Good Jesus, for the sake of Thomas forgive us our trespasses, be present in our house, our gate and at his shrine and keep us safe from fell death. Restore to us our customary piety and keep us from straying in mind and body. Glory be to the Father and to the Son and to the Holy Ghost, as it was in the beginning, is now and ever shall be, world without end. Amen.

Gem of Canterbury, pray for us!

I hope this will help explain why I have taken St. Thomas Becket as my patron saint (I was especially thrilled to find that he is still on the Roman calender in both the Tridentine and the Novus Ordo and I try to go to Mass on his feast day every year: December 29th).

I am hoping...time permitting that is to start to write some posts on various popes picked at random. They are fascinating to read about and I hope that others would be interested in reading about them too. Let me know what you think :)

War of the Worlds and Father...

2005-07-04T00:32:00.000-04:00

I saw War of the Worlds on Saturday. Overall it was a good movie with some suspenseful scenes that actually succeeded in making me uncomfortable especially the way the people died in the movie. There are some criticisms I have with it but it has to do with the usual "aliens destroying earth or disaster" movie making. LOL, I don't know why but in movies of this nature it seems that the poor suckers always wait till the last minute to flee from danger and then it is to late for them. I would definitely not recommend this movie to kids (I have no idea why so many parents took their small children to this movie...This isn't the sort that kids should see...Even the character of the father in the movie was trying to shield his daughter's eyes from the horrors they were facing). I find it sad that to many parents don't take the sensibilities of their children seriously.

Anyway, I went to see Father today. The talk was helpful I think. He believes I need to be in an academic environment since for long I haven't been (been working in a mall for six years while waiting for my life to start..lol). I think the talk I had with him was very encouraging and it will help me I think. I was told something very interesting today at work. About two weeks ago, I became involved in a rather heated discussion with a strange prot about Biblical interpretation, etc. Another customer had joined the conversation and pretty much (or at least I thought) he was agreeing with the other guy (this fella left before the customer I was having the heated conversation with declared that such dogmas as the Trinity and the Hypostatic union of Our Lord Jesus Christ are traditions of men and therefore are wrong to be believed) but it seems that this guy had other ideas. He had looked at a Biblical commentary and he was starting to believe that maybe the Catholic Church is right. So, this fella comes to my register today with two books from Fr. Alfred McBride (he's a good priest and at the RCIA at my parish, we have used his little book on the catechism). The customer wants to find out about the Catholic Faith all due to that strange conversation I had had with that nut job. LOL, I had thought I had overstepped my bounds as an employee by getting into such a discussion but it seems that the reason why I had it was for the benefit of the other customer who only momentarily had got into the fray. I think his name is Alfred (I tried to find the credit card receipt..or at least the one that I think he had). Either way, since I am not sure of his name, I will at least pray for this guy and maybe I will get the opportunity to speak with him about the Faith at a more appropriate time.

I knew he should have been kicked out!

2005-07-02T02:24:00.000-04:00

Well, now I have heard everything. For years I have heard of the crazy antics of our least favorite Cardinal: Mahoney of LA. Now he has gone and done it: having a ceremony of sorts for the new Mayor of LA with questionable rituals and then attempting to get some pro-lifers arrested for coming into the "cathedral". Well, I second the sentiment of many in Catholic blogland: Hey! Hey! Ho! Ho! Cardinal Mahoney has got to go! Maybe Mahoney can get his own little parish in Rome somewhere and be archpriest of that just like Cardinal Law (i know..he doesn't have a tiny parish, he has the oldest Basilica there: St. Mary Major..but you know what I mean). However, even the idea of reducing Mahoney to a parish priest is a scandal to any parish. Hmmm, honestly what to should the Holy Father do with him? Well, first thing that needs to be done is pray for him. I admit, I haven't prayed for Cardinal Mahoney. He needs a major conversion. Then, well, the Holy Father does have an e-mail address. We could send him some e-mails. I have thought about e-mailling the Holy Father several times over about other issues although I seriously doubt that he would be able to read any of them. Still, it wouldn't hurt. Who knows, he might get to read a few.

Anyway, in my last post I said that I was meeting with Father at 11pm on Sunday. LOL--that should read 11am. HAHAHAHA: at 11pm on Sunday I would have just got off of work and probably reading the blogs and I honestly don't think that Father would want to meet anyone that late :).

Father finally called!

2005-07-01T14:33:00.000-04:00

Well, after about two weeks of waiting for a response from Father...he finally calls me. LOL, he is a very, very busy priest which is why it is so difficult to reach him. However..I hope that my meeting with him on Sunday at 11pm will help....although it will probably be cut short since he must hear confessions about a quarter till 12. At my parish..we have confessions before every Mass. In spite of Father's busy schedule..I do appreciate any advice he can give me and I respect what he has to say. I have always been wary of "counselors" and psychologists. I have never liked them so I would go to a priest first before going to a "counselor." I am going through a bit of depression. I don't know how serious it is but I want to be sure that what I have been experiencing isn't just a spiritual problem. If it is..then I think Father can help..if not...well...I really don't know what I will do since going to a shrink isn't exactly something I can afford.

Its strange: I had started this blog to discuss the current situation in the Church but for some reason this blog is turing into "Rachel is bearing all her problems forum." I don't think this is stuff that most people want to read about. I need to get back into writing essays on issues relating to the Church..so...this will hopefully be the last post discussing my personal problems :).

Musings on the past week

2005-07-01T12:20:00.000-04:00

Well, there isn't to much to muse about except for some of the stuff that has been going on in Rome. I watched the Mass on the Feast of Sts. Peter and Paul. I noticed that the Holy Father decided to use a more colorful miter and he decided to use another chausable with shells on it (I guess its one of his favorite symbols). The Mass was lovely and I especially liked hearing the "Mass of the Angels" for the Kyrie, Gloria, Credo, Sanctus, and Agnus Dei. His homily was rich with symbolism and Catholic truth as usual. What was also cool was a delegation of Orthodox bishops was there too. I wouldn't hold out to much hope that a healing of this 1,000+ year schism can be healed in such a short period of time but I would love to see it happen :).

I know I was a bit upset on my last post due to that e-mail I recieved. I decided to put my pic on here so that everyone can see for themselves. Once I figure out how to put a pic on my profile..I will do it. Also, it seems that it still has my old e-mail address up. So, here is the new one: ealfric@comcast.net. Anyway...I'll find out more stuff to blog about later....I hope. :)

2005-07-01T12:19:00.000-04:00

here is a pic of me....I tried to put it in my profile..but..lol..I don't know what I am doing sometimes :)

Attention all Singles: Don't Sign Up for Ave Maria Singles.com

2005-06-25T21:13:00.000-04:00

Well...after several years on that stupid online singles site and not ONE response for any fella. I did the stupid thing of e-mailing one of the staff to maybe get some suggestions as to what I might be doing wrong. My profile is very enthusiastically Catholic, etc. Yes...they also ask for a description and a pic. Yes I have those up there. Well..what does this fella say? this staff member? The reason why no men have bothered to contact me is because of my weight. It doesn't matter that I am a faithful, devout Catholic who wants to raise a devout Catholic family who is also a defender of Holy Mother Church. Nope....that doesn't matter. All that matters is weight. Yeah...he said...well you can lose a couple of pounds and maybe I will get contacts from fellas. He had the nerve to say then that I "shouldn't take it the right way and that he was saying this is charity, etc, etc." Please!!!!!!!!! I'm to upset right now. What is it? Does everyone thing that all fat people are automatically lazy? I work my butt off five nights a week and I am involved in my parish. What is it? Is that what it comes down to? Are my worst fears to be realized that no man would give me a chance because I'm fat???? I don't know what else to say.

oh no....I don't think I read Italian...

2005-06-23T00:28:00.000-04:00

LOL...I put the italian version of the Sandro Magister's site up. Here it is in English: www.chiesa.espressonline.it/index.jsp?eng=y. Hopefully this will do it :)

Still Waiting......

2005-06-23T00:19:00.000-04:00

Well, Father still hasn't called me yet. He said that he would just before he went into the sacristy to vest for Mass this past Sunday. Hopefully I will recieve a call before then. There really isn't very much to blog about tonight although I find it interesting that Cardinal Ruini is voicing his hope that a new and hopefully definitve interpretation on what Vatican II was really all about. I would be interested to see what he or someone at the Vatican has to say about it. Sandro Magister at www.chiesa.espressonline.it has an article about it. Take a look. Vatican II has been misinterpreted to much. I should know since I too have misinterpreted the Council. I guess this means that I really need to find me a copy of the documents so that I can read them myself :).

May he rest in peace...

2005-06-21T13:40:00.000-04:00

I believe it was reported yesterday that Cardinal Sin has died. From what i have read about him, he was a good Cardinal in the Phillipines. Hopefully, whoever succeeds him will do a wonderful job. I am also pleased to hear that the Holy Father wants to go back to a more traditional pontifical mass. It would be so cool to see the more traditional one done not only on tv for special occasions but also at World Youth Day. This does sound promising for us who are trads and who still love the old traditions. Anyway, I know this is a short post and i thank you for those who have reponded to my last post. Father said that he would call me sometime this week to set up an appointment I hope. I haven't recieved a call yet. He is usually good about giving me advice. Well, its off to work. Hopefully I won't be in a terribly tired state nor an annoyed one (it tends to happen when you get there and you see all the mess that customers leave for you..I tend to wonder if a bunch of dogs have gone through the place and not people). Its really quite pathetic :(.

Contemplating what I should do with my life..

2005-06-18T02:03:00.000-04:00

Ok, I know its been a bit while since I have blogged and it has largely been due to work and various things I have had to do. Anyway, I have been having difficulty trying to figure out what I should honestly do with my life. I do pray about this a lot, especially at Adoration and Mass. It has been frustrating for me. I do have a real desire to be married although I haven't found any decent, devout Catholic men around here who also have a desire to be married. Just about all of them want to be priests, monks/brothers, or simply want to stay single and make no commitments. It can be annoying. I definitely know that we need more priests and I am definitely happy when there are more made but I also know that we aren't going to get more priests without having good solid Catholic families. Look at the Holy Father's family as an example. Due to the faithfulness of Mr. And Mrs. Ratzinger..Not one but two priests came out of that family. I think that is definitely a testimony of what a truly Catholic family can do when the parents are faithful and teaching their children--vocations will be fostered.

I know several people will say that I should look into being a nun/sister or just remaining single. Well, I have been searching in my heart as to what gets me fired up. Well, I know that I am fired up about the Faith, I love the Tridentine Mass and I am active in Una Voce, I also love intellectual discussions, reading history/religious books, and talking with others of different religions than my own. I am also a geek of the fantasy/scifi variety and yeah I get excited about stuff like that when a new movie or book comes out. So..what should I do? I don't have any desire to be a nun/sister but I want to do something related to the Church. I guess I feel that I would have more and I hate to use the word "freedom" to be in contact with a great variety of people of different backgrounds/religions who I can talk to and be some sort of witness to and have very fun intellectual conversations with.

I think that the main reason why I don't really have a desire to be a nun/sister is because I honestly don't have a Dominican/Franciscan/Benedictine/Carmelite type of "spirituality". In town we have the third order Franciscans and the third order Carmelites but I honestly don't have any desire to be involved with them. I desire to read and study Church/Ancient/Medieval history as well as the history of the Norse/Anglo-Saxons/Celts. I guess you might say I am more of a scholar in that sense. So, what exactly should I be doing? Teach? Maybe..I dunno. LOL...This is why I haven't blogged much since I have been thinking about this a lot. I am definitely going to talk to the priest about this although I am sure that I did talk to him about two years ago about a similar situation but he knows me well so I'm sure that such a conversation will hopefully be fruitful.

As for as other stuff to blog about:

Hurray for the Holy Father and the Italian bishops that that stupid referendum didn't go through in Italy about the loosening of the restrictions on embryo/fertility research. The Holy Father and the Italian Bishops had encouraged the people to boycott it and many of them listened to them.

UGH! Is all I can say about the reaction to the Terri Schiavo autopsy. It seems that some in the media are "gloating" about this one. The point about that whole sad fiasco is this: so what if she had no hope of recovery. Her parents were willing to take care of her and just because one is severely brain damaged..That does not mean that one has any right to kill them.

Aruba case of that missing girl: sad, tragic story. But...What the heck was that girl thinking?? Going out with strange fellas to a night club? And where were the chaperones?

Michael Jackson case: no surprise at the outcome of that case. However, I think that he does need to get shipped off to an asylum somewhere. The "guy"? needs serious help.

Anyway...Enough of this particular post. Its almost 2:30 in the morning and I have to be at work in a few hours. However I have to say: see Batman Begins. It is the movie that should have been made first although Tim Burton's Batman I thought was good but the others were terrible. This one however, is pretty good and it raises many good issues.

Reflections on Pope John Paul II

2005-06-04T13:08:00.000-04:00

I haven't really discussed my thoughts on the late Holy Father and how his death has affected me. I must be honest here: I wasn't a big fan of the late Holy Father. I admit that I was perhaps a bit overly critical of him in some areas. I know there are others who loved him alot and I admit that I didn't love him like I should have I think. We all knew that he was ill for a while and that he wouldn't last much longer. However, I don't know why I have felt this sense of guilt since his death. I didn't love him as much as I should have. I was critical of him. I had wondered why he had become so pacifist in the wake of 9-11. Why did he kiss a Koran and why did he apologize for several events in Church history that Her enemies always rant about (the Crusades, the Spanish Inquisition, Galileo, etc)? These were the things I was critical of. Then there was the added problems of heretics running some parts of the Church, liturgical abuses running amok, and the hostility toward those who are orthodox and love the Tridentine Mass, sacraments, and devotions.

I had wondered why he didn't do anything about this. Although I also knew that in the case of the Tridentine Mass, He had wanted it to be more widely celebrated or at least had hoped that the bishops would be more generous. Some of these things that he did has incurred the wrath of at least some of the wackier nutcases in the Traditionalist movement. They have claimed he was a heretic. I will do no such thing because I never considered him a heretic. I still had my respect for him but where I find myself to have this guilt is the thought that I hoped the next pope would be better..that he will set things right. I did have this thought on occasion before Pope John Paul II died. I don't think I wished for him to die. At least I hope not and I have searched my thoughts on this matter. That would be terribly cruel to wish such a thing.

So, what were my thoughts on the events that happened at the time of his death and the aftermath? After poor Terri Schiavo went to meet her maker I believe on March 30th if I recall, the attention shifted once again to the Vatican where previously on two other occasions in February and March, the Holy Father had to be taken to the hospital. He had fallen ill again and this time it was far worse than the two previous illnesses. I watched, knowing that perhaps any moment the announcement would be made that he had died. I have wondered what he meant when he said, "I have looked for you, now you come to me", referring to the thousands of the young in St. Peter's square who were serenading him and praying for him.

On the afternoon of April 2nd, I was headed for work. Fortunately I didn't have to be at work for another hour and a half when I got there. I went to the cafe to get something to drink and then I sat down to read a book I had in my hand when I glanced over at the tv. They showed a picture of Pope John Paul II and below it, 1920-2005. I knew then that he had just died so I moved to the bench right in front of the tv. Even though I had anticipated this happening, I still wasn't prepared for the shock of it. I couldn't get any tears out but I was choked up as I prayed, "Eternal rest grant to him O lord and may perpetual light shine upon him. May the soul of Pope John Paul II by the Mercy of God rest in peace." I prayed this much along with a few other prayers. I felt weak and I was in pain. I had lost someone who was more dear to me than I had realized and this is probably where the guilt comes in :(. I hadn't realized what his example had really meant to me. This was solidified with what happened right after the initial shock.

I have been working at the mall for the past six years and only recently started to work at the bookstore, which is not part of the Mall but is attached to it. Anyway, over the years I have come to be somewhat acquainted with many different people and customers who would come to my previous places of employment and have also come to my current job too. So, I am recognized unfortunately to much. Such was the case that Saturday afternoon. All around me it was noisy. The Yugioh tournaments that we have every week was going on and the customers would just go about their daily business, completely oblivious to the historic events taking place on the tv screen. There I was in the middle of all of this, in prayer, choked up and in sorrow when a customer came up to me and asked who the pope was trusting in now. I thought that was an odd question. He elaborated by saying that the pope had talked about trusting in Mary and the Church but not mentioning anything about Christ. I said that he was trusting in God. The customer wanted to push the question further and I told him that "I am not going to have this conversation right now." I felt very, very offended. Here I am, in prayer, in grief at the passing of my spiritual father and all this idiot can do is ask if my spiritual father was trusting in the right person or not. He was implying obviously that the Holy Father, like all Catholics in his opinion, don't really trust in Christ.

For the rest of the day I worked, trying to get my mind off of all the events that had happened. I did feel a hole in my heart so to speak. It became all that much more real to me when I saw the Vatican's website with the symbol of sede vacante was on it instead of the usual St. Peter's and the tiara with keys. The next day was Sunday of course, only one week after Easter. Instead of wearing bright colors in honor of the season we were now in, I wore somber colors. You could feel the silence, the sorrow of my friends. We didn't speak much after Mass. Many of us left. I'm sure it was the same at many of the parishes. All the Sunday Masses had become funeral Masses. All had become St. Peters with their pictures of the Holy Father at the front of the altar with a candle next to it just as it was at the basilica.

For the next few days I had the tv on, watching everything...the body lying in state, the masses of people coming to pay their last respects, etc. I woke up early to watch the funeral mass. I also went to a special Mass for the repose of the soul of the Holy Father. It was there that the tears had come. I really did miss him. I decided to buy all the special issues of various magazines on the life of the Holy Father. I do this sometimes when very important historical events happen.

I have been inspired now to read what he has written. I have read a few things. They are good but I would like to read some more (after I finish the books that were written by the new Holy Father Benedict XVI). Now Pope John Paul II's cause for sainthood has been opened. I knew this would probably happen. If he is declared a saint then I'll ask for his intercession. Until then, I continue to pray for his soul. I feel regret that I didn't love him like I should have but I think this will change. In the case with Benedict XVI, I had already been familiar somewhat with him before he was pope and he was the one I was hoping would be pope. However, I am trying to get to know him more by reading his books. I don't want to do the same thing again that I did with Pope John Paul II.

I think that there is a sad tendency among many traditionalists to either be overly critical of the Holy Father or in some cases, totally reject him by declaring him a heretic and therefore not the pope. I admit that a couple of years ago I was in the first camp and I have been dealing with these issues. I think this is why I had the attitude that I had with Pope John Paul II. Since his death however, I have come to appreciate him more. Sadly, I think this happens alot when a loved one dies. Those who survive them didn't appreciate them like they should have when they were living and now when they are dead, they regret it. They regret that they didn't love them more or try to see eye to eye with them or simply--tell them that they love them :(.

When a person dies there is the grief that the person is gone and what reconciliation or understanding that those around them might have wanted to settle with the person is forever lost. The regrets set in. Especially if the children, the spouse, the friends didn't have a very good relationship with them or they were overly critical of them. They regret the things that they said or didn't say. They regret that they didn't love them like they should. For some reason, I felt this in some way. I have strived to not repeat the same mistake again.

In my journey to the Catholic Faith, two beliefs struck me as being true from the very beginning of my investigation of the Catholic Faith: the Holy Eucharist and the Papacy/Magisterium/Church Authority. From my reading of history I could see where it was definitely needed and how it is needed today. I fell in love with both. My love of the Eucharist who is Christ Himself has grown and over the past six years, so has my love for the Papacy. I don't know where this will take me exactly..but perhaps devoting my attention to scholarship of the History of the Church and the Papacy wouldn't be a bad thing. I dunno--maybe being a papal historian? I'm still wondering what I should do. This is just one of the things that have effected me after the death of Pope John Paul II, the only pope I had ever known about although technically I have lived under now four popes (but I was a baby back in 1978 so I don't remember Pope Paul VI and Pope John Paul I). My prayer is that I will come to love Our Lord more and more and love His Holy Church and the servant He has chosen as His Vicar: Pope Benedict XVI as well as my own bishop, Victor Gaelone. May we love our priests and our bishops more, praying for them so that they will be led by the Holy Spirit and shepherd their flocks well. Pray for the Holy Father that he too will be guided by the Holy Spirit and that he will shepherd the flock well too :).

A Plug! Yey!

2005-06-04T02:07:00.000-04:00

Thank you Cacciaguida for making a plug for my blog. I guess this means I need to post at least once a day..LOL. Anyway, I got a good comment on my post on ecumenism. Hopefully I will have my reflections on the death of John Paul II (I have been meaning to write about them) and other musings I might have. Recently, I have been reading several of the Holy Father's books. Right now its "God and the World" a very good one that has been helpful to me in many ways. I love "Salt of the Earth" and "God is with us". I think that is the title. Introduciton to Christianity however...will take some time reading. Also, I did just finish the website for Una Voce of Northeast Florida. I'm on the board of directors and the webmaster. Check it out: Una Voce of Northeast Florida . Anuyway...I guess this is it for now. I'll post something longer later.

What is true Ecumenism?

2005-05-28T00:37:00.000-04:00

The subject of ecumenism has been controversial in some Catholic circles for many years now. For some in the so-called "traditionalist" groups, the Church's commitment to ecumenism is considered a heresy and a complete break with the 2,000 year tradition of the Church. It is due to the commitment to ecumenism that several of these groups, or at least some people in them have claimed that Blessed Pope John XXIII, Pope Paul VI, Pope John Paul I, Pope John Paul II, and Pope Benedict XVI are all heretics and therefore--are not popes. Does the approach that the Church has used in ecumenism stem from modernist/heretical teaching or does it in fact derive from the 2,000 year tradition of the Church? What truly is ecumenism and how has the Church responded to other religions in the past 2,000 years?

The understanding of ecumenism is basically this: to foster friendships or at least a mutual understanding with people of different sects or religions. This doesn't in any way claim, as false ecumenism does and what popes of previous decades like St. Pope Pius X rightly condemns that all religions are equal. I don't believe this is the view of the Vatican II and post Vatican II popes. It has been clear by their statements and their actions that they don't believe that other religions are equal to Holy Mother Church or that protestant sects are on equal footing.

What several of these groups fail to remember is the Church's approach to evangelization and ecumenism for the past 2,000 years. From the very beginning of the Church, She has acted as a loving mother to those who are not in her fold. Remember how St. Paul used the pagan altar to the unknown God in the pantheon in Athens? Other Church Fathers would try to foster friendships with those they wished to bring the light of the Gospel to. The Church would use local customs or myths, etc to explain what the Gospel truly is all about. In some cases all that was needed was to convert the king/chief, etc and the rest would follow. In other cases other approaches were used.

When one reads the Church Fathers, one gets the impression that they were not ecumenical. Well, in that time the Church was zealous to save souls but She also had to formulate what the Faith was. There were many heresies at the time that needed to be refuted. When dealing with heretics/schismatics, the Church has always desired their return and therefore She is patient with them, pointing out their errors and praying for their return.

So, what is so different with the approach that has been used since Vatican II in ecumenism? The Church has acknowledged that there is some light of truth in the protestant sects and other religions. This does not mean that they are equal to Holy Mother Church. What the Church wants to do is foster a greater unity. Why? Well, look at the situation the Church is in. Look at the situation that many of the religions are in. The Church needs allies in Her fight against relativism and especially secularist humanism that has created a "Culture of Death."

Has every approach that has been taken in regards to ecumenism been fruitful or the best way? No. Perhaps some of the things that our dear late Holy Father Pope John Paul II did wasn't the best thing (kissing the Koran, some of the excesses of the Assisi meetings, etc). However, he was trying to reach out. This reaching out to others..coming to an understanding where they are coming from and where we stand can lead to conversions or to a lessening of hostilities toward each other. This isn't syncretism, a heresy that has been condemned by Holy Mother Church..this is simply an approach to unity that is sorely needed in this time.

I will give you an example from my own life. I am a very ecumenical person. Just take a look at my family. I was the first in my family to become a Catholic. My father was curious about what his daughter was getting into, so he started to read many Catholic materials. Within about two years, he came into the Church. My brothers and sister haven't decided what they want to do yet. However, the younger of my two brothers has been going to Mass with my father and I for several months now. As a result of listening to our conversations and going to Mass, he has pretty much come to the decision to convert and hopefully will be attending RCIA in the fall. My mother on the other hand is a staunch Baptist. This is where ecumenism must come in. I admit that I haven't always given a good example due to various factors. At work, it is even more imperative that I be ecumenical. I work with people of various religions. I hope I have been a good example of a Catholic there. At least I hope, in regards to the wiccans they will see what a real Christian is and hopefully won't have only images of crazed fundies in their minds. I pray for their conversion and I speak with them on occasion when we get the chance to speak. I listen to what they have to say and I share with them what we believe. It is helpful at times.

I have spoken to Buddhists, Hindus, Muslims, those who follow Judaism, as well as other protestants. Speak the Truth with charity. That is what ecumenism is. By talking to each other, it is hoped to at least come to a respectful understanding. This doesn't mean that one accepts their religions or lifestyles but it does mean to treat them as fellow human beings who also need salvation. The conversion will ultimately come from the Holy Spirit. The Church believes this too. She is committed to ecumenism--true ecumenism so that souls can be saved and so others who don't know the full truth will be more open to the Holy Spirit's call. This is in keeping with the 2,000 year tradition of Holy Mother Church. The Holy Father Benedict XVI, like our late Holy Father remains committed to this task. May we all heed the Holy Spirit's call and be witnesses to others by our lives so that in turn, those who do not know the truth will be more open to accept it.

Corpus Christi and other ramblings on a very late Thursday..

2005-05-27T00:53:00.000-04:00

Ok..I got two comments from my last post. I will defiantely try to blog at least once a day, permitting that I am able to actually get on my computer and not at work or it is being used by my sister. Anyway, I just finished watching a very beautiful Mass and procession in Rome on EWTN for Corpus Christi. There are only a few places left who celebrate it on Thursday instead of Sunday when I will be able to partake in one of these most beautiful of feasts. My heart it seems has been left in Rome. It had gone there on March 30th when we found out that Pope John Paul II was gravely ill and hasn't left since :). I did notice one peculiarity at the Mass today on EWTN. The Holy Father has been wearing a pallium that has red crosses on it. However, the one I saw him wear today clearly had black crosses on it. Could it be that he has two palliums and we haven't seen this one till now? It seems that no one else in the blogger world has commented on it..I wonder if anyone has seen the same thing?

Now to comment on the feedback I have recieved. I will definately try to put some stuff on Church History and anything else that interests me at the moment. The time I have had to spend on writing and blogging hasn't been very much but since this semester is over (Thank God..it was a dismal one) I will devote more time to doing this as well as putting more essays on my website. I had thought about writing two essays..actually one is more of a personal reflection on our late Holy Father, Pope John Paul II and the other will be on what true ecumenism is and how the Church has dealt with this issue for the past 2,000 years. If any of you have suggestions for other essays...that would be great too :).

Some Ramblings on a Wednesday...

2005-05-25T01:36:00.000-04:00

I know I haven't been consistently blogging but I haven't had a chance too and I am still trying to get this site in order. I need to put more links up but I haven't got around to doing it. Anyway..some ramblings:

I saw Episode III last week. It is one of my favorites. I liked it alot although it was definately sad.

I found out there is actually at least one person who reads my blog. I didn't think anyone did since for some reason I haven't been able to get onto St. Blog's Parish. I have submitted my blog several times but I have recieved no confirmation at all that I can be added. Anyway, meanwhile I will continue to ramble in the hopes that someone will read it.

From what I have been told from the few people who have read it...my essay entitled "Who Are These Guys?" is getting a good response. I know I mention that dreadful "Novus Ordo Watch" in the essay. It seems that my dear former friend hasn't caught wind of my essay yet and even if he were to read it..I doubt he would say anything about it on his site since it is taken up with the so called heresies of Pope Benedict XVI. I have liked for the most part what our Holy Father has done in the past month although I can't figure out why he would appoint Archbishop Levada to the CDF. Maybe...Maybe...he won't be as bad as everyone is making him out to be. I for one has been praying for the Archbishop in the hopes that maybe he just needed a change of scenery to give him a spine or at least a bit more encouragement along the Tiber instead of by the Bay. I fully understand that it isn't easy being Archbishop of San Francisco...perhaps one of the nastiest cities in terms of morals one can find in the USA. Granted..most of the bishops in this country are sadly lacking in a backbone. Perhaps this is because we criticize them endlessly without actually praying for them. I admit to being guilty of this too. Some of them have harmed the Church so much here but then again...it isn't just them. Maybe we do expect to much from them in terms of excommunications and dropping the hammers on heretics. Yes..I would love to see that happen and there are some that have stood their ground but to many of them have shown their weakness to stir waves. It isn't just them though..the priests and many, many laypeople are just as bad. The Church in the USA needs tremendous help. Let us pray for our bishops, priests, religious, and yes...us laypeople. Pray for the Church. She needs our help.

For any of you that read this blog..please respond in the comments box. I'd like to know what you think and give me some suggestions on how to make this blog better. :)

I am feeling Geeky today!...

2005-05-18T14:18:00.000-04:00

Yes, I haven't been blogging on here very often. Now that finals is over I can do this with more frequency. I don't even know if anyone reads my blog or not. I know I have just started it and for some reason I haven't recieved any e-mails back from the folks who run St. Blog's Parish. Anyway..there is much that has been happening. As usual, I have been keeping watch on what has been going on at the Vatican. The Holy Father has appointed Bishop Levada to the CDF. I don't know anything about this guy. However, I have been praying for him in the hopes that he will do a better job than what people think. Some responses to this appointment and the new coat of arms has been histerical. I'm not sure why...especially concerning the new Coat of Arms. Anyway, I'm still very hopefully about this Papacy. All we need to do is pray.

With this subject in mind, I have written a new essay on my website, entitled Who Are these Guys?. Check it out and let me know what any of you think..if anyone is even reading this.

Now for the strange title for today. Yes, I am going tonight..Midnight showing of Star Wars Episode III. It is times like these that I can be at my most geeky. I don't have a jedi costume..but I do have a cloak and a light saber. I'm all in black and I will wear the cloak tonight. It is the most Star Warsish thing I have. I have been dressing up for some movies..notably for the Lord of the Rings movies. Anyway, I'm off to see the movie later and I will blog about this and other matters that are going on in the Church :)

Musings on the Holy Father's inauguration Mass and other things...

2005-04-24T15:30:00.000-04:00

I know I haven't blogged in a couple of days since I have been on cloud nine watching the encores and other shows related to our new Holy Father :). I woke up at 2:45 am this morning to get ready for Mass and watching the Holy Father's inauguration Mass. It was a beautiful and joyous Mass and I'm still on cloud nine. I managed to stay awake at Mass thanking Our Lord for the Holy Father and praying for him as well. I was most fascinated wit his pallium since it was so different from the usual ones that have been worn. I found out on some of the other blogs that this particular pallium was used more often in the first millienum of the Church (just look at some of the mosaics and paintings). Anyway, this is such an exciting time in the Church.

However, there are a couple of short musings I would like to make concerning the Church's enemies, in particular, some of these feminsts who are angry with the election of Pope Benedict XVI. It has been grating on me and perhaps some others that these "womyn" claim to speak for all the Catholic women of the world. They seem to think that we are also for "women priests", for "abortion", for "contraception" and every other heterodox and dissident setiment. Some of them have even indicated that women will be leaving the Church in droves due to the elevation of Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger, now Benedict XVI to the papacy. I find that odd considering that the last time I checked, I happen to be of the female gender (it is honestly unmistakable and I can't change what I am) and I also happen to be a devout and faithful daughter of the Church who follows Our Lord, loves Our Lady, and is a simple defender of Holy Mother Church. I don't see myself and other women like me leaving the Church. Why would I? I love the Truth and since the Lord showed me the that the Truth was totally in the Holy Catholic Church, then I had decided to come in of my own free will. Why would I want to leave? I love being Catholic and I especially love the stance of Holy Mother Church. She will not change the teachings that have been handed down by Our Lord to the apostles. So, for all those heretics and dissidents out there, the gauntlet has been thrown: repent and be welcomed into the loving arms of Holy Mother Church or if you can't do that then please leave. It looks like the sort of place you would like is the Anglican Church that doesn't seem to know what the word truth is any more.

HABEMUS PAPAM!

2005-04-19T13:10:00.000-04:00

Yey!!, former Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger is now Pope Benedict XVI! Yey!! Well, I will definately be praying for him ;). Hopefully he will have a good pontificate. May God bless him and Holy Mother Church :)

Conclave, Black smoke, and more......

2005-04-18T16:49:00.000-04:00

Well, the day has finally arrived. The conclave has started--Yey!!. LOL, I find it so funny that the secular media feel it newsworthy to mention that all we got was black smoke today. I decided to take a nap since I knew that there wouldn't be a pope elected today. I believe it will take at least 2 to 4 days but I could be wrong. All I hope is that we get a holy man who is also generous (the the Tridentine Mass people who are in full communion with the Church) and who loves Our Lord and the Church. I went to Mass today with the intention to pray for the Conclave. This is a very exciting time since this is the first time I have seen this (actually..technically I have also been through this twice before...but I was a baby back in 1978). So, I wait in anxious and hopeful anticipation. I'm off of work tomorrow so I am sure that I will be watching more of the coverage (lol...I can't keep away). Fox news (with Chris Wallace which was a suprised) had some guests on talking about the real reasons behind the Conclave. They actually mentioned Faith and that it is the Holy Spirit who ultimately decides (LOL--this would never be said on CNN) who the Pope will be. So, this young, traditional Catholic convert will wait in hopeful ancipation, praying for the Conclave and praying that the Holy Spirit will lead them to choose the right one :)

A clarification on the last e-mail

2005-04-16T12:45:00.000-04:00

Ok, I need to clarify one thing. When I said, "nostalgic elderly people" I didn't mean it in a nasty way. I know several elderly people and they are very kind and devout Catholics. What I meant was anyone who goes to the Tridentine Mass because they are nostalgic (yes, it does mean that there is a sizable amount of elderly people who go to the Tridentine Mass who are nostalgic). I don't want to turn back the clock (especially not back to the 1940's and 1950's..one of the darkest times in history). I want to move forward. I think that the Tridentine rite can help us do that..to move forward. I see absolutely no reason why the two (the Tridentine and the Novus Ordo) can't flourish together? The Novus Ordo needs alot of work (currently it is only being celebrated in the original intent of the revisers at the Vatican, EWTN, and maybe a few other places..but otherwise..it is abused time and again..it isn't being celebrated the way it was supposed to be celebrated). I know that the Holy See is trying to curb some of the abuses and has set new guidelines to follow, but we here in the US hasn't seen them (i think I heard that ICEL is at it again...figures). Anyway, I just wanted to clarify my comments since I didn't want it to sound like I was denigrating elderly people :)

Some musings on the state of the Traditionalist Movement

2005-04-16T12:11:00.000-04:00

In the past couple of days, I have been in a discussion concerning the state of the traditionalist movement with a friend. My thoughts are that we are in a sad state. For to many years, the radical wing of the Traditionalist movement have been having their say. What they are saying has been terrible. Some of them are sede vacantists (when we have a Pope), claiming that our late Holy Father, Pope John Paul II was not the real pope and the last one was possibly Pius XII or in some cases, they will claim Pope John XXIII was. This is the most wacky side of the traditionalist movement and a side I refuse to be associated with. I am a convert to the Holy Catholic Church and I am not about to put my soul in jeopardy by siding with schismatics and heretics who truly do not love Our Lord and truly don't have trust that He is guiding the Church. Am I upset with the heretical doctrines being promulgated by some of our bishops and priests? Of course I am. Am I upset with the lack of faith, abuse of the liturgy, complete disreguard for Our Mother? Of course I am. I am disgusted with the heretical bureaucrats who have weaseled their way into many of the Catholic schools, colleges, universities, and dioceses.

I am disgusted with this and will continue to defend Holy Mother Church because I love our Lord and Our Lady and I hate to see our Holy Mother treated with such contempt and disrespect. I love the Tridentine Mass, the sacraments, and many of the traditions that makes us uniquely Catholic.

I feel great sorrow at the "so-called" traditionalists who have hard hearts. Who didn't have any love for our Holy Father, who don't have any love for their fellow man. I am especially disturbed with the growth of anti-semites in some circles of the "so-called" traditionalist movement. This is very disturbing since they clearly have forgotten what the Church and what the world went through only about 60 years ago. Also, they forget that Our Lord, Our Lady, the Apostles, and many of the early Christians were all Jewish. This fact escapes them, as well as the fact that the Mass (yes, even the Tridentine Mass) has its roots in ancient Jewish rituals.

What I am proposing is a new face of the Traditionalist movement. Those of us who are loyal Our Lord, Our Lady, and Holy Mother Church must speak out. The traditionalist movement is not a haven for nostalgic elderly people and heretical whack jobs. Sadly, this is what most of the rest of the Church see. This needs to change, and I for one, will, with the Grace of God show a different face of the movement--through my actions and my words. This is what I am trying to do now in small ways. May God grant me the Grace to continue.

Some thoughts on funeral and other ramblings...

2005-04-13T22:51:00.000-04:00

Yesterday I went to the funeral of a lady who went to my parish (actually, I found out she had been active in three parishes) and was a part of our fledgeling little traditionalist group called Una Voce of Northeast Florida (I'm on the board of directors). Due to various circumstances that I won't really get into detail here, she didn't have a requiem Mass, just a small funeral service that felt like a small church baptist service than anything. It was conducted by a deacon friend of hers. At first I dismissed him as a liberal whackjob until several of us went to Benningtons to eat lunch. I sat across from him and had a delightful conversation. It turns out that this fella didn't harbor any heretical ideas and was a devout man (now I know why she liked him). The sad part about this botched up funeral was that she wasn't even buried since the Medical examiner had ordered an autopsy done....after the embalmers tried to embalm her! So, poor Sue, she won't get to be buried now for at least another day. May she rest in peace.

Anyway, now on to today and my little rant..LOL. I had to work this morning at the streetside register, putting away shipment of books. Needless to say, I wasn't in a good mood at all. It got worse having to put away books full of heresy (what else do you call the "Christian living" section? its all protestant, heretical ideas) especially books that was slanderous to Holy Mother Church (please...must we hear that She is the whore of babylon again?). It also struck me, just by looking at the titles of many of the most popular "Christian" books that they all appealed to our consumerist, materialist culture. There is nothing in these books that pertain to holiness the way that our books on the Saints and various aspects of Our Faith do. It is sad that and very pathetic that this is what passes for "Christianity" in this country. We have a whole aisle filled with nothing but diet books. Must we also have "christian" diet books too? The same is true with the other ridiculous titles. It made me just a bit ticked. I hate most of them. The books that actually deal with Holy Mother Church take up about two and half shelves...about 30% of them are full of lies about the Church written by Her enemies. At least over the past several years, the store has improved their selection of Catholic books, but it could be better. I guess this is enough rambling for now...LOL...I invite comments on just about anything pertaining to Holy Mother Church and how to live our Faith.

Welcome to my attempt at a blog

2005-04-13T00:48:00.000-04:00

I have no idea why I have started one of these things but I have been looking at some good ones lately and I just couldn't resist..LOL. There really isn't nothing much happening today but I will post when I can on what is going on in the Church and the St. Augustine Diocese.